sameoldsong | OPEN TO ALL (ALL RATINGS)

Steve just listened patiently as Sean rambled on. He had no problem just letting the man talk. It didn't seem like he was doing so to hear himself talk or to fill silence, just that he had a lot to say and barely slowed down while saying it. Plus, Sean did stop to ask questions so it wasn't like he was selfishly monopolizing the conversation either.

"I use my phone for calling and texting, looking up directions, and searching references I don't understand and that's about it." Steve admitted. If he did look for odd jobs it wouldn't be to get paid for them but to just help people out and he didn't want to take money away from people like Sean who needed that sort of thing to live. Sean was right, he didn't really need the money to live off of.

"But I know the people in my neighborhood and do some odd jobs here and there for them. Mostly the older folks who don't have the money or the ability to take care of things. It's nice, they can tell me about the "good old days" that were times I never got to experience but would have."

"You should fuss around with some of the apps and stuff. You can get nearly anything on your phone, it's grand. Like- oh, I've a police scanner on my phone, and it's so handy, I always know why the cops are in the building now or what's going on nearby, so you never step out the door and bam, middle of a taped-off area and now the police are shouting at you for blundering into it." It's his own fault really, he should be paying better attention before he just goes jogging out the door, instead of bolting out and snagging himself right up in the tape and then getting yelled at.

It's a little funny hearing Steve talk about doing jobs for folks in his neighbourhood. He knows this by now, but it still always catches him a little by surprise that Steve Rogers is as good as he's supposed to be. It's nice y'know? Like maybe some stuff actually does work out the way it's supposed to. Like some people actually do mean it when they say they're good people, instead of just faking through it.

"That's nice of you! Hopefully the good-old-days talk is fun instead of maddening. Some of the stuff they talk about, I swear to God, it's like do you hear what you're saying? You want to go back to that?" He sighs and shrugs, "I've gotten pretty good at just nodding along and changing the subject when it gets nasty. Hopefully you've mostly got good stories about old times, instead of the tiring ones."

"I help a little with a couple of the old folks downstairs, but mostly that's me changing the hallway bulbs before we all break our necks, and then they yell at me to come help them with their apartment because at least Mrs. Wilson thinks I'm working for the super. It's not so bad though, she just mostly can't reach anything over her shoulders, so I'm slowly dragging her apartment down to like, chest-height." He raises a hand to mock it out, and it's below Sean's chest height, that's for sure. "My god do they just shrink up. I'm half afraid to lay eyes on my ma again, she'll be nothing more than the fiercest looking doll-sized woman you'll have ever seen. Nobody can lay a guilt trip like her, nobody. Just like the nuns. Same sharp eyes - did you get those? Or did you go public when you were a kid?"

Sean looked up a little bit after he met Rogers at the gym, but nothing more than a quick skim on wikipedia, since it felt strange reading up on a man's life when he couldn't do the same. He knows Steve was born in New York and raised here, and he knows he went off to fight the war after being part of some experiment, and then he crashed in the ocean rather than let the nazis nuke America, but he doesn't know the details. Did young Steve Rogers have to put up with nuns? And jesus, old school nuns too, the ones who wouldn't get in even a little trouble for smacking your hand wide open with a ruler.

"Were you blundering into a taped off area because you were looking at something on your phone?" Steve asked, giving Sean a bit of a knowing look. He wasn't sure that he understood the fascination with constantly checking your phone. Sure it was nice to be able to look things up but it seemed like so many people were missing the rest of the world. Or maybe it was just that right now the rest of the world was a mess and they were using connections on their phone to fix it.

"I went to public school but I missed a lot of classes because of health reasons at the beginning of school," he said. That had been a huge fight with his parents because he hadn't wanted to miss classes. Steve never wanted to be held back or given different treatment. "Eventually I convinced my parents to let me go despite that. I hated being denied doing what everyone else did just because it was harder or more dangerous for me."

He appreciated that Sean had asked though. A lot of people wanted to know about the experiment or his missions or things like that. They wanted to know about Captain America. Not very many people seemed interested in Steve Rogers the person.

Sean laughs and rubs the back of his neck, because Steve's got him to rights on that one. "Weeeell, I might have been looking down, you know, sending a few messages to fellows. Usually when I step outside, there's nothing too exciting going on, so it's a safe place to stick my nose in my phone and stare down. But I always look up now before I blunder out and into some sorta stand-off."

Public school then, though it sounds like he had a hard time of it. Sean nods a little, remembers stories his ma told him about how it was when she was young. "And not going would have put you in a far worse state in the end. I had a great uncle who was sick a lot. He never got an education, and since he couldn't do a lot of the real physical jobs, there wasn't much he could do. He got lucky, and the family helped take care of him but... ma always said it ate at him, living off other people's paychecks. There's nothing more important than feeling like the stuff you have is your own."

It's why he can stand living in the places he's lived, and doing the jobs he does. At least he's taking care of himself. At least that's his work that's paying for things, and keeping himself fed and clothed.

"What were your folks like?" Most of the stuff Sean read only talked about the jobs they had, and how they died. But that's not who a person is, that's just what they did, and what the end was.

"My dad died when I was pretty young so I don't have a lot of really clear memories of him. They were both strong Irish-Catholics though. Mom tended to be over protective. I think after all the health scares I had as a baby and then losing dad it really made her hang on that much tighter to me," Steve said. He didn't talk about his parents much, in part because they'd both died before he was 20. But he liked Sean and he didn't want to avoid talking about his parents all the time. They didn't deserve to be hidden away just because part of their lives was sad.

"I- remember," he said, eyes crinkling a bit as he gave a small chuckle at the memory that had just surfaced. "I remember one time she caught me standing on the back of the couch to grab some window blinds. I'd just got done listen to a radio show and she asked me what I was doing and I told her that I was Tarzan. The look on her face when she realized I was about to swing from her favorite curtains... I don't think I'll ever forget that."

Sean can't help but laugh, imagining skinny little kid Steve about ready to swing from the curtains. "Oh Jesus, Christ, I can imagine. My ma straight up wouldn't let us watch some TV shows, because we'd all take to kicking and punching each other afterwards. The older ones got away with it until the day Connor bloodied Niall's nose over Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and after that, bans for everyone, even the ones of us who weren't even born for it. 'course we just snuck around and watched it with the sound down real low while she was distracted, and scrambled not to get caught."

He has a sip of his beer, and it's funny how nothing really changes. It's sorta nice, kids always being kids, no matter what. "She must have been real good at that perfect sorta- 'I'm not angry, but I am disappointed' sorta face because let me tell you, you've got that on lock. You gave me a guilt trip over a text, and it worked. Honestly, that's the real superpower here. Give you ten minutes alone with most supervillains and you could have them packing up their whole operations. 'Shut it down boys, I have to go home and call my mother and apologize'."

Steve still thought Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was the most ridiculous sounding thing he could think of. He'd seen part of an episode of it before realizing that you definitely had to be a kid to enjoy that sort of thing. Not that it was unpleasant it was just... not for adults.

"She definitely had that exasperated look down," Steve admitted. She rarely gave him a disappointed look, not because he didn't disappoint her but that she was good at hiding it. Always using those times for correction and reflection. "And I think most people find it easier to do good with just a little accountability. Someone to remind them that it's worth doing the right thing. For themselves and for others."

Steve's not wrong, not at all. Sean knows part of the reason why he does the things he does - right down to occasionally doing illegal work - is because there's nobody to really hold him accountable for it. Yes, there's laws and stuff, but that's not the same, especially when Sean knows how much laws don't actually apply to those who have money. If Sean's less-than-legal jobs were to get busted tomorrow, he'd go to jail, but the guys he's working for wouldn't get more than a slap on the wrist. After a while, it gets easy to ignore the little voice in your head saying 'this is wrong, you shouldn't do this'. Especially when rent's coming due, because the landlord sure doesn't care about doing the right thing either.

"Well, you're doing a grand job of bringing accountability back, so cheers to that." And he lifts his beer to Steve in a bit of a toast. "I'll probably always be the sort of man who needs a bit of a kick in the ass to do the right thing, but I will do it, eventually. I just need a little reminding sometimes that taking the high road is worth it, in the end."

There's another of those damn gold commercials on the TV again and Sean glances over at it for a moment before he snorts and looks away. "You know, I've been here four years now and I'm still not used to it all, not by a long shot. I swear, I'll be forty-four and still trying to understand 'em. How many times can you play the same commercial in an hour? Just you watch though, it'll be back by next break, and all your breaks are shorter than ours too. I can't imagine how dizzy it's been for you to get used to things again. I was born in this century, and I feel like I'm always falling a little behind, like I'm in a race where everyone's got running gear on and here I am in my jeans and work boots. Like, so I bought a new phone about a year and a bit ago, and didn't realize half of what it could do until well after I got it. By chance I watched one of those tips and tricks video and realized I could have been having it go quiet at night this whole time, instead of getting woke up at 4am by texts. And wouldn't you know it, that was the key to finally getting a decent sleep. You can't be tempted to check your phone when you don't know you've gotten a message on it."

Which, now he's tempted to glance at his phone, see what he's missed. He ignores the impulse, knowing it'll seem insufferably rude to Steve if he pulls it out, even for a few seconds. "I suppose putting it on silent isn't really something you get to do though, which is a shame. Everyone deserves to shut the phone off and ignore the world for a bit."

"Well, I'm here to give your ass what it needs," Steve said with a grin, happy to motivate his friend to do the right thing. He wasn't naive or ignorant though, he knew just how hard it could be to make ends meet. That was why it was important for people to help each other out, especially in a world that so often seemed stacked against people trying to do the right thing. It wasn't enough just to stop HYDRA or aliens or whoever was attacking, people had to be good to themselves and each other though.

"I think it plays so much because they don't expect people to watch the entire thing. People aren't going to watch from start to finish but so this maximizes the number of people that pay attention because most are going to turn away after a bit," Steve said after a moments thought of staring up at the TV. It wasn't like in his day where if something was on the TV you either watch the whole thing or you missed it unless you were lucky to catch the rare rerun. Today you could watch just about anything over again since everything was recorded.

"And I get time away sometimes. I'm not saving the world right now," he pointed out with a grin as he took a sip of the drink. It wasn't half bad, especially since he couldn't get drunk so he had to just appreciate the flavor all its own. Really, he was here more for the company than anything else. Steve liked Sean, liked how the man rambled and didn't treat Steve like he was some sort of icon but an actual, real person. He didn't get a lot of that.

It's so, so hard not to laugh or go beet red as Steve's phrasing dips straight into wish-fulfillment territory. Sean manages to splutter a little laugh, and to keep it down to a dull flush. God, does he know what he just said? He might, and he might be fucking with Sean. Or he might not too, it's hard to tell. He splits the difference, returning innuendo without being too explicit about it. "T-thanks, I'll take it anytime."

He's got a point about tuning it out. Sean knows he finds it hard to stay focused sometimes, since it's so hard to tell what's actually important, and what's just part of the endless barrage of meaningless information. Sometimes it's easier just to tune out entirely, and hope someone would fill you in on the important things later. It had been a pretty good system so far - he nearly always got what he needed to know about just by listening to other people talk.

"Alright, true, true, and it's good you get breaks. I don't know what it pays, but I expect it's not much if any. I know it's the right thing to do but... it's a lot to ask from handful of people. Still, glad you're doing it. And if by some freak accident I end up with powers of my own, I'll count on you to steer me in the right direction. Maybe get me a costume of my own, though god only knows what I'd dress myself up in." Sean snorts as a mental image comes swirling in. "If Victor wasn't such an ass, I'd get him to design something. He's good with that kind of thing. He's a for real artist you know, got his sculptures in a couple of buildings around town. Victor builds these huge uh- oh! Kinetic sculptures! Like, the ones that move around and uh, y'know, wind makes 'em move or they've got motors and stuff. It's really neat."

To be honest Steve wasn't sure what he was doing. Was he flirting with Sean? He liked spending time with the other man and he had to admit there was attraction there... he was just terrible at making a movie. That had always been Bucky's thing. It wasn't even that Steve was shy, or at least not just that, there always just seemed to be something else that needed his attention or was more urgent. That and he was never sure if the attention was welcome.

"Just because you come into some powers doesn't mean you have to put on a costume. And you don't need powers to save the world. You watch out for others. You don't think it's a big deal, but you do."

So maybe Steve had been paying a lot of attention to Sean. And Sean was good people. The kind of people that didn't think they were necessarily all that good because they thought they were just doing what they were supposed to do.

It's a weird feeling having Steve Rogers look straight at Sean and tell him that he watches out for others, and just... lay it out like that. It's easy to shrug this stuff off normally when it comes from other people. Sean's not a good person. He's lazy. He makes the easy choice, rather than the hard one. He makes a chunk of his money working for people he knows are breaking the law, helping move shipments of stuff he just doesn't ask about. Because he knows if he asked, and he knew was in the crates, he might not be able to look the other way. If he knew was in there - drugs, or guns, or stolen goods - then he'd have to do something. And what can he do? He's just one person...

But when Steve says it-

"Maybe." Sean says, and for once, he's not downplaying. He means it. Maybe he could. Maybe he could watch out for others and do the right thing. It would make life harder than it already is but... maybe. He's pensive for a moment, "I'll try that a little more. I want to do better. And honestly, if I got powers and I didn't use them to help out, I don't know if I could live with myself. Not to be dramatic but... I don't know. If everybody else out there is using them, and I'm the one using my powers to just... I don't know, float fridge beers over to me? Move bigger boxes? That sounds fun for a bit, but it'd eat me up after a bit..."

He makes himself perk up after a moment though, giving Steve a smile. "That's not so bad though. Being a hero has it's perks. I'd get to hang out with you more often. Plus, depending on what I got, I might be able to do some neat tricks. Maybe I could talk to animals? That'd be fun."

"If there were people with powers using them to just help a little in their everyday lives, would you know about it?" Steve asked. Obviously he would hope that everyone, powers or not, would try and make the world a better place but he knew that not everyone could be a soldier or a superhero. Not everyone had to or needed to put on a costume. They all just had to try and make the world a better place and treat people with kindness. Then there wouldn't be a need for soldiers or heroes.

"And talking to animals would be useful. You could do a lot of good with conservation and things like that too. There's more than one way to save the planet," he reminded Sean. Steve wished the news wasn't always so focused on the Avengers and what they were doing. "And you don't have to have super powers to hang out with me more."

"That's true... and I know enough people who do have powers who use them only to ruin everyone else's lives." Sean agrees reluctantly. That's the part nobody likes to think about for too long.

But, he snorts a little at Steve's offer and like that, the easy smile is back. "I hope you realize I'm taking that as invitation to invite you out more. Because I will. I'm not like everyone else who says 'we should have a drink' and then never actually does that. I will text you to meet up again. For, well, more beers if you want, or whatever else you enjoy doing. Personally? I really like getting up on top of buildings and looking out over everything. Or finding all the statues around the city. I had no idea how many there were until I got one of those walking maps. They're absolutely everywhere, just tucked behind all kinds of corners."

"Just make sure to ask a lot. A lot of the time I'm away working or have to leave suddenly," Steve pointed out. It seemed like Sean would understand that but he wanted to make that clear. As much as he liked Sean, and he really liked Sean, he couldn't put the other man above what Steve did. As long as Sean understood Steve would make time for him as much as he could then hopefully they could continue... whatever this was.

"You'll have to show me some of your favorite statues. As for the tops of buildings... have you ever been to the top of Avengers Tower?"

Sean nods. "Oh no problem there. I get it, y'know, you've kind of got the world on your shoulders. So you take care of that, and I'll just pester you when you're not in another country, or there's not aliens coming out of the sky."

He likes Steve a lot. But one of the reasons he likes Steve is that he's a good man - a genuinely good man, not just someone who speaks big but won't be able to go through with what's necessary in the end. And a good person wouldn't choose somebody like Sean over the whole world, just like he knows that Steve Rogers would never choose himself over the world either. Hell, Steve already did pick the world over himself - that's why he's here in the 21st century, and why New York's still a place on the map, and not a radioactive crater.

He grins as the Avengers Tower gets brought up. "Never had the chance. If that's an invitation, I'll take it in a heartbeat. I see it all the time when I'm on the bus, and I looked up if they had the deck open to the public buuuuut... not so much."

"Why don't we go head up there after we finish our drinks then?" Steve asked, smiling at the other man, glad he could do something special for Sean that wasn't just saving the world. Getting up to the top of the tower wasn't something a lot of people got to do and if Sean liked being up there...

Of course, it was the equivalent of asking Sean back to his place after drinks and Steve wasn't sure if Sean would get any ideas. Steve still wasn't sure if he wanted Sean to get any ideas. He knew that he didn't want Sean to not get any ideas... because more and more he was liking the idea of Sean maybe being more than just a good friend.

"Oh absolutely, that sounds fantastic to me." Sean grins right back. He's been wanting to get up there for ages, but he figured that was one of the decks that would stay off limits, just like the other private towers. But, he'll get that view now! "You suppose it's alright if I snap a few pictures of the view from up there? I like sending them to my sister so she can see how big the city is. Eliza's always going on about how she can't imagine living in a place where you don't know everyone's business. I think the best part about the city is that nobody knows the dumb shit I've been up to except for me and whoever got caught up in it."

And he makes sure to drink his beer instead of just letting it sit and get warm, especially now that they've got a destination in mind. Sean's not banking on this being more than just a chance to see the view, but he'll be happy to see where it goes.

"I think that would be fine. It's not like you'd be revealing any security secrets, but I appreciate you asking first," Steve said, impressed by how thoughtful Sean was. Not a lot of people would have asked if it was okay to take a picture and would just have assumed it was okay. Sometimes it still amazed Steve that everyone could so easily take a picture of just about anything. At times it was a little scary to think of.

"And I could never imagine living anywhere but New York, not really. I've been stationed other places but this is always home. Or was... it's definitely changed over the years," he admitted. He wasn't going to be too sorry for himself though, a lot of people in the war had lost their homes in a lot worse circumstances. His had just changed without him.

"Oh sure, sure, seems like the fair thing to do. And I imagine you get enough folks just snapping photos without asking. Jesus, I'm a nobody, and I still catch people taking a photo of me now and then. That's the one thing I don't like about New York, y'know, people don't really seem to care about asking permission before doing stuff." It's the big reason Sean's never asked for a picture with Steve. He feels like if he did that, it would change things and probably kill any chance of them being real friends.

Sean nods and though he can't speak to how New York's changed, he can agree with Steve about not wanting to live anywhere else. "I knew the moment I stepped out of the airport and saw the city. Nothing's ever felt like home the way New York does. The city's just so alive, and so busy, and there's always something to do. Sometimes, I miss how quiet and green home could be sometimes, but y'know? There's parks all over the place, and it's not the same, but it's close enough. I don't know if there's anything like that here for you, but I hope there is. I hope there's some places that feel right still, like old neighborhoods."

"Have you tried being less handsome? People might not take as many pictures of you then," Steve suggested with a smile. Steve wouldn't have any problem with Sean asking for a picture, friends took pictures together all the time. If Sean was going to capitalize on Steve's fame he would have done it by now.

"And I know what you mean. She's a city with a life all her own, like a person. I get how it's not for everyone but some people? Some people it just clicks with and you feel like it's embraced you as much as you embrace it."

Sean snorts, and his face gets a little pink. "Oh, maybe, but like my brother says, God gave me looks because he didn't give me brains. Could be worse though, could be trying to get a snap of me when I'm making an ass of myself at a party. I've seen enough of them go around the internet at lightening speed."

God, you'd think Steve was a poet from how lovely some of things he says are. Sean didn't know much about Captain America other than what he'd read from the wiki and from movies and TV, and he'd known on some level that Steve was the sort of man who was good at giving inspiring speeches, but he never would have guessed he'd be the kind of man who could put feelings into words in this way. It puts a smile on Sean's face. "I like that. I like it a lot. Embracing you as much as you embrace it. If you ever end up retiring from saving the world, you should write stuff. You've got a way with words."

"I think you're selling yourself a bit short in the brains department too," Steve said, smiling and shaking his head. He was an only child but he had Bucky, who was basically a brother, to understand the sort of teasing that went on between siblings.

"Thanks, but I'd prefer to paint. I did a lot of that before the war and really liked it. I wasn't too bad either. And that doesn't require you to become a super soldier either so it's definitely an easier path in some respects."

Sean grins and waffles his hand a little. "Maybe, but I mean, God was pretty generous with the looks."

"Oh yeah, really? I didn't know that." He tries to imagine Steve as a painter. It's funny how it's easier to picture him sitting at a desk with a notebook to write in, than it is to think about him painting on a big easel. "What sorta stuff did you paint? Landscapes, or portraits, or was it more symbolic sorta stuff?"

"That he was," Steve said with a bit of a laugh, taking a sip of his beer in attempt to hide the blush that crept into his cheeks. Sean was very handsome, there was no denying that. And Steve was interested in him for more than just that but there was no denying that aspect to him as well.

"And I liked landscapes and portraits. Which I know is really different but I like painting things that are there," Steve confessed. While he really loved a lot of abstract work that wasn't where his heart was and he'd never been particularly good at it. "There's so much beauty in the world and in people I like the challenge of capturing that."

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject